It's been a long time since my last blog. I've got a new goal to try to blog once a week--let's see how I do.
During this month, I've planted a garden, taught school, written more of my book, and watched my brother's kittens grow and become more than just balls of fluff that eat and sleep. I've been down on myself a lot this month--I'm not making a difference in people's lives, I'm not dazzlingly beautiful, I'm not dating anybody, I have to commute more than an hour to work, I can't run more than half a mile before I have to stop. But I don't like being a complaining person.
So I'm going to change.
So what that I can't run that far? I want to run in a 5k. I'm going to run as far as I can every day and walk the rest of those three-point-something miles. Eventually, I'll get to 5 kilometers running. So what that I'm not dating anybody--that's partially a hazard of my job--not many single guys in Elementary Education--but I can socialize with members of my church and get to know them better. So what that I'm not a supermodel? I can take care of my body and be more beautiful than I think I am. So what that I have to commute to work? I'm going to apply for jobs closer to home--as soon as I get those stinkin' letters of recommendation--and, hopefully, I'll get a job. If not, I should be happy that I have a job in a good school.
And do I really not make a difference in people's lives? Maybe it's because I can't see that difference that I feel that way. But I can also serve others more frequently, care for them, be there for them.
So here's my thoughts: life continues whether you want it or not. You can complain about it, or you can live it. I want to live it.
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Very much agreed. It's so easy to feel like that we aren't worth much to anyone else, but you're absolutely right, life just keeps going, so we have to find ways to make it worth it to ourselves at the very least.
ReplyDeleteI wish you good luck in getting to the point that you can run a 5k, I was about to accomplish that myself until of course I dislocated my pinky toe. It's a useless toe anyways right?! Why even have it? I don't think I would miss it... anyways im rambling.
Way to go staying positive, and I can't wait to read more. I really like getting to know you :)
Personally I stink at goals that are time-marked. Get x task done every y time period just doesn't work for me. If you can get it to work for you, good job! If not, know you are far from alone.
ReplyDeleteAs for being who you want to be and making a difference for others, the first I think you are beautiful and amazing but it is what you think of yourself that matters, the latter probably isn't seen because you are making a difference of good in people's lives other than what you want to be doing. Don't ever underestimate the good you do just by being near and sharing your smile. You have no idea how nice you are and how nice the day is because of you!